Jared Allen: From Pocatello to a Pink Cadillac

Prior to last season, Jared Allen learned that he had a partially torn labrum in his left shoulder, which would inevitably require surgery to repair. He decided to tough it out and play through it.

Why? Just ask his dad.

“He’s always been rough and tumble,” Ron Allen said, proudly. “My whole problem growing up was I was never afraid of anything. Jared is exactly the same way.”

In 2011, Allen was a half of a sack shy of tying the all-time single season record of 22.5 set by Michael Strahan in 2001. Now, less than two years later, the Vikings have yet to extend the All-Pro defensive end’s contract that is set to expire after the 2013 season. In fact, they haven’t even discussed it.

“We haven’t talked one iota,” Allen said.

What gives? Allen has finished in the top 10 in sacks in each of his seasons in Minnesota. He even finished eighth last season while playing through a pain that would force most men to learn to eat their Lucky Charms with the opposite hand.

Yeah, there was a six game stretch in which the quarterback eluded him in all but one contest. Yeah, his sack total dropped from 22 to 12. But he still started every game and led the purple and gold defensive line that was ranked first in the NFL in rushing yards per game allowed.

All of which was accomplished with a muscle tear that required a cortisone shot that was probably slightly more agonizing than the flu shot all of us can hardly bear every holiday season.

So what does Allen’s untouched contract mean about his future up north? Based on the current situation and general manager Rick Spielman’s intentions of maintaining a youthful roster, it’s entirely possible that Minnesota might plan to part ways with Allen after the 2013 season. Currently, Allen is one of only four players on the Vikings’ 90-man roster who are older than 30.

Don’t call six-foot-six, 270-pounder over the hill just yet though. The 31-year old likes to party, “with two r’s.”

The partying started in Pocatello, Idaho… in pajamas.

What’s in Pocatello? That’d be Idaho State, the only school that would take Allen after he got kicked out of high school for stealing yearbooks. As for the pajamas, well that’s just the way No. 69 is.

But it wasn’t all fun and games in the middle of nowhere. Far from it actually.

Allen hated being a Bengal, felt that he was too good to be playing division I-AA football, and did everything he could to make those facts known. It wasn’t long before he was arrested for a bar fight… his first of many.

Anyone who was foolish enough to step up to him on weekend nights ended up on their backs or in the hospital, and Allen ended up in cuffs. Once for assault. Another time for DUI.

The last straw came in his junior year when he was arrested after yet another fight. The university and the town of just over 54,000 that housed it were as sick of Allen as he was of them. They wanted him off the team and out of town, but head coach Larry Lewis pleaded for one more chance.

He even agreed to stand next to his star in court and promise the judge, “No more trouble.” The judge relented, allowing Allen to avoid jail time in exchange for community service. On top of that, Lewis suspended Allen for the rest of the season and made it clear that he only had one more shot to play the game that he once loved so much.

Finally, Allen got the message.

Unable to train with the team, he worked out in an empty weight room in the wee hours of the morning before classes. He ran countless stadium stairs alone. He dropped 20 pounds, got stronger, and became faster and more explosive. He used his pajamas for sleeping, not fighting. He stayed in his apartment, and stayed out of trouble

.

“I got my life straightened out,” he said. “It forced me to grow up. I was always getting bailed out of everything, and I had to take ownership.”

When Allen finally got back on the field his senior season, opposing teams wished Coach Lewis hadn’t given him another chance. Unlike in his previous three seasons, he took no plays off. He got his anger and short fuse under control, harnessed it, and used it to terrorize offenses en route to winning the Buck Buchanan Award, given to the country’s best Division I-AA defensive player.

The Kansas City Chiefs drafted him in 2004, and in his rookie season he started this trend of almost breaking records. Remember how he almost broke the single season sack record in 2011? That’s kind of his thing. In 2004 he finished one sack shy of tying Derrick Thomas’ Chiefs rookie sack record of 10. When asked during the course of that season if he was going to break it, his response gives a glimpse of arguably the most colorful personality in the NFL.

“No, actually I was gonna get really close and then not do it.”

That’s Jared Allen for ya. Since being drafted he’s been red stag hunting in New Zealand, running with the bulls in Spain, skydiving in Arizona, zip-lining through the rain forests of Costa Rica and bear hunting in good ole Idaho. He even killed a 200-pound wild boar with his bare hands (and a hunting knife).

He drives a pink Cadillac, wears No. 69, and every item in the shop on his website, jaredallen69inc.com, is on sale for an amount ending in .69, because it’s funny. And of course, you can’t talk about Jared Allen without mentioning his mullet.

The glorious mane made its first appearance in 2008, when Allen was traded to the Vikings. According to Allen, the mullet is not just hairdo, but a lifestyle that carries on a legacy started by manly men like Paul Bunyan and the “badass” dudes of the 80’s who didn’t shave their legs and asked for extra mayonnaise.

He even went as far as shaving a stripe in the side of it for every sack he got in 2008 because he had a bet with his financial adviser for who could have the best mullet by April. By the end of the year, he had 14 and a half. It’s unknown whether his money man had any stripes for the amount of taxes he helped minimize, but I think it’s safe to say that Allen emerged victorious.

Unfortunately, Allen’s fiancée came out on top in 2010 when she made him chop the locks before they tied the knot. She couldn’t keep the country boy business-minded forever though, as the party in the back was poppin again on May 4.

“The only way to come back from surgery is with an amazing mullet,” said Allen. “Foundation has been laid.”